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Wednesday, July 14, 2010

First Live Night on America's Got Talent: Fighting Gravity is the Act to BeatAmer

The first 12 acts took the stage live tonight in the America's Got Talent quarter finals. Only four will move on to the semi finals. Judging from tonight's performances it may be tough to find four in this group.

Here is how the night played out on AGT.

First up was Kung Fu Heroes, a combination of martial arts and dancing. They were okay and may have wanted to go easy in case of opening night nerves. They better go bigger if they get to come back for the semi finals.

Piers: "... it wasn't as mad as in your audition..."

Sharon:"...it was more like a martial arts exhibition."

Howie:"...it's the choreography that was weak..." and then described the group as "Power Rangers with eye shadow".


Sister act singers Christina and Ali took the AGT stage next. The two suffer from Cystic Fybrosis so it's hard for them to breathe let alone sing. You cannot tell. They did a decent job with Rascal Flatt's "Bless the Broken Road", though the song was a little big for their obvious nerves.

Piers:"...It does matter because it's a talent competition, I'm not going to sit here and patronize you... this [Hollywood] is really scary... it was much improved from your audition"

Sharon:"...I'm not going to say anything negative..."

Howie:"...you both are so inspirational... there were a few notes off but it doesn't matter... I love you!"

Now we have the band that isn't a band, Airpocalypse. Yes they are funny. Yes the music they air guitar to is great. I can hear it anytime I want. I can go to YouTube.com anytime I want and see people dancing around. I don't get how this is a Vegas act worth a million dollars. Maybe if it were in the comedy category, maybe, but to take the spot of a real band? Shame on the AGT judges.

Piers:"...half the acts on the charts lip sync so what's the difference?"
*note to Piers: You are propagating it, and that's sad.

Sharon:"...You are great actors... it's fun."

Howie:"...I gotta tell ya, I go on Twitter and there is a lot of controversy over you guys...it's amazing how much you can do with nothing!"

Hot Shot Tap Dancers are a brothers and sister act. The three brothers and one sister are fantastic tappers and manage to work some hip hop moves in to keep things current. I'm not sure if there is enough support for tap dancers though. They did well enough to earn a spot to the semi finals on AGT, I think.

Piers:"I wanted some oomph... it was all a bit safe... you've gotta explode..."

Sharon:"... I love your relaxed style... you make tap current..."

Howie:"... I like the blend of classic tap and current music... I think the bench and can [props] got in the way... focus on the dance..."

Paul Safy Jr. is a crooner and tonight was a rough night for crooning. Trying his best Michael Buble impression, he came off more like Robert Goulet... on a Love Boat rerun. The music over powered most of his performance. I don't feel like I missed much though.

Piers:"I like cheese, Michael Buble is cheesy... your problem is you need to relax...."

Sharon:"...you have a great tone... your performance was cheesy and dated..."

Howie:"...I'm not sensing oomph... I sense the cheese factor..."

Ladies and gentlemen we finally have a wake up call from the youngest AGT competitors tonight: Bailey and Miles... or Future Funk! These little dudes rocked the house. Both are complete hams and crack ups, perfect for charming America. The hip hop duo is only ten years old and five years old respectively and have more talent than most of the adults on tonight's show. America does have talent!

Piers:"...you two are just hysterical! ...you have star quality..."

Sharon:"How old are you again?... sensational, absolutely amazing!"

The pair asked Howie, "Deal or no deal?"
Howie:"Deal! ...you're so cute... you could have any girl you want!"
Neither young boy was interested in Howie's deal...yet.

Here is an audition video of Future Funk to tide you over!


Hand whistler Sally Cohn, the oldest competitor tonight followed the youngest. Sally has a lot of spirit and likes to talk about it. I think we know far too much about the hand whistler. If what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas it might not be a bad place for Sally Cohn.

Piers:"... best rendition of that song I've ever heard from a hand whistler, maybe best ever... you are a wonderful inspiration"
Sally Cohn replied, "aw, my inner kitty cat is purring."
... and there was a collective ugh heard round the world.


Sharon:"I'm speechless..."

Howie:"You're a dirty girl.... I love you... you are so unique, there are a lot of musicians but there is only one Sally Cohn."

There was a last minute substitute in the 'danger' category. Tristen and Kristen were replaced by Nick Pike. Nick Pike is apparently very afraid of fire, well so am I. He jumped through a hoop of fire...m'kay. He juggled large pins with the tips on fire...m'kay. Nick Pike even set his legs on fire. It was okay. Piers Morgan actually 'X'ed him (and Nick was pissed).

Piers:"...America may be loving it, but I wasn't...if you take the fire out it was a simple juggling act with you running around like a child rhino..."

Sharon:"... it was very dangerous.."

Howie:"...I think you are incredibly talented, it's too much... I can't figure out who you are or how to frame your act..."

Nick was ready to answer all the judges and discuss things further (read: light Piers on fire), but Nick Cannon came to the rescue.

RNG is a young dance group made up of five girls all about 11 years old. They did a hip hop number and were costumed appropriately for their age. RNG managed to keep things edgy with some tight hip hop moves. The AGT camera man should be taken out and flogged for missing part of the act, losing it in fog.

Piers:"...I agree with Howie... I'm not sure you're going to get through..."

Sharon:"...spot on... perfect for your age..."

Howie:"...I thought it was more of a dance recital... I don't think you are ready yet..."

Maricar is ... well, I have no idea what she is, or what her act is anyway. Tonight she was a pretty woman in a scuba suit, painting a bad picture inside a water tank. That was it. Paint a little, come up for air, paint a little more. Yawn.

Piers:"...if David [Hasselhoff] were still here he would have saved you in his red swim trunks!"

Sharon:"...I applaud you... you are a beautiful artist..."

Howie:"....you have a terrific set of lungs!"

The group of the night was definitely Fighting Gravity. The America's Got Talent audience finally had a chance to cheer again, and they did. These frat boys from Virginia Tech are amazing at what they do, and what they do is entertain. Think Blue Man Group... pure entertainment.


Piers:"... creativity, innovation and uniqueness... that was the performance of the night!"

Sharon:"...incredible, and your prospects are incredible..."

Howie:"...you blew me away!"

Ending the first live night on AGT was Nathaniel Kenyon, a young male vocalist. I wanted Nathaniel to have a great night, but he did not. He came down with a cold and throat infection and I could barely hear him, but what I heard was not good.

Piers:"... It wasn't the best vocal performance... you are becoming something resembling a pop star..."

Sharon:"...if this wasn't good, I can't wait to see you when you feel good!"

Howie: (wearing a surgical face mask) "... you're sick and I'm worried about you, but mostly about me... Justin Bieber called and he wants his hair back!"
Nathaniel answered with, "Mr. Clean called!"

That was the end of the first live night for AGT 2010. Remember only four acts can go to the semi finals. Find out tomorrow night who gets eliminated. Selena Gomez and Rock of Ages will also be on tomorrow night.

Or just stop back by and find out the results here!

Leave me a comment on who you think should move on from tonight's America's Got Talent!


Copyright @ 2008 TV Review

2 comments:

  1. I agree with most of what you have said here except Airpocolypse, they were fantastic, stepped it up from their auditions big time, pure entertainment ... and Future Funk, children should not be allowed on this show, how can they possibly be a vegas act, what happens when they are get older and arent cutesy-wutsey any more? Shame on their parents .. I am surprised only 4 are going through, going to be a hard choice

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  2. These lil bubbies got game!

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